I am an independent woman who is in disagreement with Karen DeCoster in her “Women, Stop Watching Oprah and Learn to Love Guns” article. I believe that the way of living she promotes may be good for her, and in line with her mentality, but isn’t good for most women or people in general.

To own and carry a gun, changes a person. To have to learn, prepare, and train in using a gun, knowing that you may have to use one someday, puts a person in a precarious position. It elevates one’s level of suspicion, putting them in more of a trouble-seeking mode in which one’s daily life is more expectant of danger. It leads to a heightened preoccupation with what they imagine could be happening. It may also give the person the feeling that they can engage in an unstable situation, as they are now armed and supposedly equipped. Small issues or situations can potentially get blown out of proportion and take on a life of their own.

The fact that this gun owner may have to assess a situation to know when to use that gun, as well as making sure the gun is not taken by someone else, increases their responsibility for life exponentially. Others’ lives now potentially rest in their hands, as more choices and quick decision-making are now in their care.

Owning a gun is not something to take lightly. It is not something to carry around to allay your fears, or to make you feel more secure; that is the wrong thing to turn to. Rather, you need to avoid situations that would require a gun, don’t put yourself in that predicament, and do turn to Oprah to learn how to feel secure in yourself.

We pay our police officers to confront danger, as it is not our job to do so. Law enforcement makes this sacrifice, as they put themselves into the line of fire for our safety. That is their job 24/7, one for which they do a lot of training and study, and yet they still make mistakes once in a while. For a civilian to carry a gun while going about their day, interferes with public life, and adds greatly to the potential of bad possible scenarios.

Unfortunately, when the cops get home, they can’t just live normal lives. They can’t fully let their guard down because they are so wired from putting themselves in the way of danger all day to make the world safer for us. They have a hard time letting go of their work mindset of constantly being on alert, because the demands of their job are so psyche changing. This is why cops are known for talking work in social situations, which are usually spent with other cops who understand them, and they have a hard time relaxing and fitting in with society as ordinary citizens. They sacrifice their peace of mind and carefree disposition so that we can have more safety.

To read a situation correctly so as to know when a gun is needed, takes years of training and a keen adeptness through experience on the job; things the civilian gun owner will not have. The police are actually trained in how to diffuse a situation without their firearm, and to only use them as a last resort. Our officers are on the beat every day, armed all the time, and looking for danger; yet they still very rarely fire their gun. If they are in these danger-seeking situations each day, and are trying to diffuse them 99.9% of the time without fire power, then we can go 100% of the time without that firepower in our lives.

Gun advocates claim that gun control only hurts the good guys because the bad guys will still find a way to have a gun in their hands. However, I have to argue that many states, in allowing their citizens to carry guns, make the job of our law enforcement that much more difficult and our society less safe. These state laws allowing concealed or open weapons on our person, make it harder for the police to stop the bad guys from doing bad. However, if carrying a gun were illegal for all, the officer could arrest and detain the criminals who are in possession of the illegal firearms; it would be cut and dry. If we then had harsher penalties for this illegal possession, our law enforcement could do their job more effectively.

For a civilian to own or carry a gun only gives that person a false illusion of safety, it doesn’t decrease their chances of harm. Total security, peace, and safety are never assured to us, so we always assume some risk of danger in living in this world. However, when Joe public is in possession of firepower, the higher the possibility of many things such as crossfire, a bad person taking it from them and using it on them as well as others, unintended casualties for which they will be prosecuted, or making a mistaken assessment of a situation that wasn’t as dangerous as it seemed and could have been taken care of another way.

When one carries a gun, there are more possible negative outcomes involving human life, rather than otherwise. Like Karen said, it may empower women or give them a feeling of empowerment, but I argue that that is not a good reason for doing it – and in fact is selfish and irresponsible. Perhaps the ‘Bambi in the Woods’ needs to be more aware of her surroundings, but not given an instrument capable of taking another life. If you want to feel empowered and less fearful, read some Eckhart Tolle wisdom, but don’t turn to guns.

Karen De Coster believes she will be safer owning and carrying a gun, and perhaps in her mind she will be. The chances are small that she will ever have to use it, thank goodness, but it seems that it will give her a feeling of safety carrying one. Unfortunately though, some gun owners who may actually need it in a time of emergency will not have proper access to it, and others who own one won’t be adequately trained to use it successfully if it came time to use it. Some may even derive a false sense of security from carrying one. For instance, because I am a woman and don’t carry a gun, I try to stay away from compromising situations. If I carried a gun, I may be more willing to enter more areas of our community. I may feel emboldened and think I am safe wherever I go, but of course that wouldn’t be the case. I would still be overpowered by the criminals most likely, or may be in contact with someone unarmed but mentally unstable. Karen De Coster said it herself, “Women are physically weaker” and “just aren’t wired to be combative”. Having a gun won’t equalize the situation, the bad guy may have a gun as well, and will still be bigger and stronger than us.

It is already my state of mind, and I believe most female adults mindset, that the world has bad people in it that do bad things to other people. We know this because we see it on TV every day, read it in the papers, and hear it from friends or co-workers. The acceptance of that is already part of our psyche. We know to watch our back in a dark alley (if for some compelling reason we have to walk in one), we know not to trust strangers on the street, to have our keys in our hand, to stay in lit and well travelled areas, and not to jog on wooded trails in the early morning or at night.

Fear is a part of our lives, and it is given a bad rap, although it is not always a bad thing. We can’t get rid of it altogether, and we wouldn’t want to. Fear serves a purpose within us, as we all know that the world we live in can be dangerous at times, and it reminds us to be careful. Owning a gun doesn’t make our world safer for us, as there are too many possible outcomes and factors accompanying its use. It may embolden one, or make one think or feel they are safer, but the psyche of people and society are too unstable for the outcome to be predictable or positive, more often than not.